My Personal Struggle

Learning to Bite Your Tongue (Even When You’d Rather Scream and swear) and the reason why!

We’ve all been there. That moment. You’re sitting in yet another meeting that could have been an email — led, of course, by the one person who lives for sending emails instead of doing actual work.

The audit’s been done, the findings are clear, the actions are obvious… and yet somehow, you’re trapped in an hour-long debate about whether the audit was even right.

Meanwhile, your to-do list is multiplying like rabbits, and all you can think is:

“If I hear one more theoretical ‘what if’ instead of an actual action, I might spontaneously combust.”

But you don’t say it, do you? You smile, nod politely, maybe even sip your coffee (careful, it’s “Caution: Hot”), and you bite your tongue so hard you’re practically chewing through it.

Because while it might feel good to shout, “You absolute twunt, can we please just do something instead of talk about it?”, you know deep down — that’s not the professional move.

The Art of Tongue-Biting

Learning to bite your tongue isn’t about being passive. It’s about being strategically silent. It’s realising that sometimes, reacting in the moment does more harm than good — especially when emotions are running high and the office email warrior is in full flow.

Let’s be honest: every workplace has one. The person who treats Outlook like a battleground, firing off paragraphs of policy quotes and “just to clarify” messages, without ever actually clarifying anything.

And then there are the meetings — glorious, time-consuming meetings where actions go to die. Hours of discussion, a PowerPoint presentation or three, and not a single actual step forward.

It’s enough to make even the calmest professional fantasise about a tactical keyboard smash.

But here’s the thing: biting your tongue isn’t weakness. It’s control. It’s the quiet superpower that keeps you focused on the outcome instead of the argument.

Focus on the Fix, Not the Fuss

After an audit, everyone loves to pick apart the findings — who said what, what the wording really meant, and whether the auditor had an agenda. But the truth is, all that chatter is just noise.

The actions that come out of an audit are where the value lies. That’s the stuff that actually improves your business, protects your people, and gets things moving.

Debating whether the report is “fair” won’t stop the next issue from happening — but fixing the things it highlighted will.

So instead of getting caught up in semantics and circular discussions, the question should always be:

“What can we do right now to make this better?”

And if you can steer the conversation there — even if you’re gritting your teeth while doing it — you’re already leading.

The Professional Poker Face

The best professionals I’ve met aren’t the loudest in the room. They’re the ones who listen, absorb, and then deliver something tangible. They know when to speak, when to pause, and when to let the noise pass by.

Sometimes, the most powerful thing you can say in a meeting full of waffle is nothing at all — followed, of course, by a concise email that actually moves things forward.

It’s a balance of diplomacy and quiet defiance. You don’t have to agree with nonsense — you just don’t have to waste your energy fighting it.

Turning Frustration Into Fuel

So the next time you’re in a meeting that’s gone sideways — when your inner voice is screaming, “For the love of all things productive, can we please just do the work!” — take a breath.

Channel that frustration into clarity. Turn it into action points, deadlines, and accountability. Be the person who ends the debate with a plan.

Because while everyone else is arguing about who’s right, you’ll be the one actually getting it done.

And that’s what really counts.

The Takeaway

Learning to bite your tongue isn’t about silencing yourself — it’s about knowing when your voice will make the biggest impact.

You can’t control other people’s inefficiencies, but you can control how you respond to them. So instead of shouting into the chaos, rise above it. Focus on solutions, not squabbles.

And if that means a few deep breaths, a silent scream in the car park, or an extra-strong cuppa afterwards — so be it.

Because at the end of the day, progress always beats pettiness. And nothing says “competent professional” quite like getting things done while everyone else is still in a meeting about it.

Keep Calm and Call BBP

At Bennett Business Partnerships, we believe in cutting through the noise and getting things done — sensibly, efficiently, and with a bit of good humour.

Whether it’s managing audits, improving compliance, or getting your Health, Safety and Wellbeing strategy actually working, we help you focus on what matters: actions, not endless discussions.

With flexible support packages starting from just five hours a week, we’re the partner on your side when you need less talk and more progress.

Bennett Business Partnerships — Practical solutions, minus the waffle.